Do not be deceived by the cute, eye-catching cover (well-made as it is). Do not make my mistake of thinking that you’re in for a fun, light romp through the misadventures of a millennial Filipina. A closer inspection of the cover reveals the black blood of the dinuguan hinting at darker themes, the stressed-out cats along with the sleeping zen ones foretelling weighty matters.

There is indeed misadventure aplenty in this collection of essays, a departure from the usual romance and fantasy books that award-winning author Mica De Leon is known to churn out at a startlingly prolific speed.

But what Mica has done is nothing less than the baring of her soul, to such an intimate degree that my initial reaction upon finishing the book was the desire to hug the author tight, and comfort her. And at the same time, to tell her what a brave, brave thing she has done: she has immortalized in indelible ink the systemic flaws of our society, and the personal cost to its women.

(And while this reviewer usually refers to authors by their family name, it is impossible to do so after reading this particular book. It’s difficult to refer to her as “De Leon” after having seen her soul writ on the page in what might as well be blood.)

“Some Days I Wish I Was A Cat” is made of nineteen essays that read like the unexpurgated diary of a highly intelligent heroine, trying to be a strong, independent woman in a society that makes this difficult. The author shows the huge gap between what a conservative Catholic upbringing prepares girls for, and what the real world demands of women. And in order to fill that void, the author voices her generation’s deepest fears and insecurities, detailing the immense struggle we undertake in our quest to have it all: career, family, and personal fulfillment. 

She writes of her passions (fantasy and romance, and promoting literacy in all its forms – especially Wattpad). She tells us all about her quest for love, still ongoing, but now refined to start with loving herself. There’s pages and pages on Pierce Brown and Brian Sanderson, and how sci-fi and books help her make sense of the mad country we live in. She muses on what constitutes the Filipino identity over Jollibee chicken joy. She waxes poetic on existential thoughts while in hospital waiting rooms, the human desire to leave behind a legacy, and what AI might mean for creatives (and suddenly I’m terrified that, after posting this entry, it will also become fodder for ChatGPT).

It must be said that the format of the book was a bit confusing for this reader, as what I took to be essay titles seem to be more of themes followed by several shorter essays. I would also recommend that one takes breaks while reading it, as I personally found some portions emotionally overwhelming / triggering. Mica’s life is the Every Pinay’s Struggle, after all.

“I am only human,” Mica writes. Ever self-deprecating despite her many accomplishments, Mica is relatable because she openly admits to not having it all, and as a reader, I find that there is a huge relief in this. It is empowering to read of vulnerability, to know that I am not alone in my personal struggles. And this is the power of her book: it tells us that it’s OK to be “merely” human, but that we mustn’t stop believing and fighting for better, for more. 

Mica’s book shows that, perhaps, to be human is the point of it all. With perfect-sounding essays and perfect-looking images available at a click of the button in the age of AI, what will shine through are works made by flawed people, who the world tries to break but fails to do so. This memorable book shows that to be flawed is powerful (when it comes with honesty and courage), and is all the more inspiring for it.

Note: Despite its cutesy cover, this book is for mature readers only!

~ ~ ~

[The reviewer received a copy of SOME DAYS I WISH I WAS A CAT for review. It retails for P465.00 from Summit Books’ Shopee and P545.00 from National Bookstore.]

ABOUT THE REVIEWER:

Gabi Francisco is a classically trained soprano who now performs in the English / Music / Drama classroom. On weekends she soaks in as much art and literature as she can, so she can pass her love for the arts on to her students. She passionately believes in the transformative role of arts education in nation-building. (IG: teacher.gabi.reads )